Not Dead Yet!

Ok, so it's been awhile since we've talked. But we've been thinking about you the whole time. And those other bands didn't mean anything. And time apart just makes the heart grow fonder, right?

Right! So get ready, cause we're coming home! or at least the one who's been away is coming home, and she's really the most important. We've got a new ep coming out ( I would have liked to say a new record coming out, but the gods have spoken and we're allergic to vinyl and moving fast...) It's gonna be on cassette tape! And CD, I guess, but that's so boring. July release, check the tunage on myspace.com/swampsexrobotsmontreal. Plus we're playing shows in Montreal in July/early August then hitting the road for an epic journey West, this time in the warm times! Yeah! Anyone who has a van they want to donate, that'd be awesome. I know you want to! Dates in Canada and the U. S of A. Stay tuned, fair gum chewers and send in your wrappers for a free kick at the can.*

*there is no free kick at the can

Photos: Adventures in Pittsburgh!

the steel mill

Nick's basement

Pretty Much Everywhere It's Gonna Be Hot... Except Toronto/Homeward Bound!

Thus ends the Sexy Shower Tour, which could perhaps be better described as the Bestial Golden Shower Tour (for the amazingly large number of encounters with cat pee we've experienced)

To sum up:

New York, New York- city so nice, they named it twice... we also decided to play twice, to, you know, drum up support. Alas, Manhattan was as unforgiving as Brooklyn and again we played to a ghost audience. The other band was amazing though, and good, drunk and good and drunk friends were in attendance. Exeunt the big city, but not before a ride on the super sweet and oh so free Staten Island ferry! Yay!

Bean town ho! And a return to the pillowy, welcoming arms of Queereoke. This time there were people there! Goodness, a real show, who would've believed it? Not too shabby for our last American date, I must say. As we drove into the sunset approaching our home on Native land, we thought for a second that we might miss the land of the free (guns) and brave (flagwavers)- or at least we'd miss the cheap liquor and cigarettes. Lucky for us there's an all night duty free shop!

And then there was the border. We're Canadian citizens, no problem, right? What the F? They searched us again! Do we really look that sketchy? Ok our van's a peace of shit, we're dirty, unshaven and have no jobs or prospects, but we're not terrorists, or at least not THAT type of terrorists (and why the fuck is it such a concern whether we received any gifts, huh? Maybe somebody, somewhere likes us. Ever think of that? Well, I guess they don't 'cause we didn't get any gifts, but that's beside the point). Goddamn, it ain't fair! We did get across (into our own facking country!) but jesus murphy... they liked our masks though.

Back in the T-Dot for one last kick at the can. This time a loft party proves to be our saviour. No annoying asshole bands, people inside, dancing and singing along (ok, it was just one girl, but she was damn cute, so it counts for, like, four people, right?) Good times. Who ever said that Toronto sucks? Err, maybe it was us, but we kinda take it back. For now.

And that's about it. Tomorrow we're back in poutine land, drowning our sorrows in cheese curds and maple syrup. At least that's the plan. Did I mention our van's a piece of shit? It's developed a few new bumps and grinds, so tomorrow should be an adventure... yeah hitch-hiking!

Big Taters and Hot Nuts!

Oh, so much to tell! hmm. After adventures in st. pitty'sburgh, we venture to D.C., wandering around the original "mall" on E street and 7th; space-aerial explorations with tycho brahe and his armillary sphere, oh the universe! Dark matter! A history written in bone bone bone, and cold stella's and ganja at Simone's dad's. Then we find ourselves back at the scene of last year's second show, dear Kansas House, in arlington VA, where we attempt to blow minds again, with mild success, lots of fun, and $2 forties. Luckily the deluge doesn't stop everyone from coming, including some folks who saw us last year! Wow! Next up is Baltimore whose free library nurses genius giant chess games in its lobby. A dream come true! After a show at the H&H building, with Pocket Lollipops, projections, country club pool break-ins and cold sake, we spend a special afternoon at Edgar's grave with fried lake trout, collard greens, macaroni and cheese and sweet sweet potatoes. The evening is made up of pop-punk, us, and glittery obi-wan-kenobi scream-noise rockers (soo good) at the Cider Haus, home of abiku. Dear natty bo, we love you.
A few traffic jams later, we're in Philadelphia, the original home of freedom (a.k.a. Philly cheese steaks) back at our man Sam's new crib. Mini fridge full of forties! Some of us indulge more than others, some indulge ALOT more than others, but nonetheless cat-pee costumes are overcome to actually make Philadelphians dance. Who knew it could be done?!? The next day brings new adventures in the form of table diving (What Recession?) before braving the creepily deserted freeway to NYC. We were invited to play on the big boat off the Jersey shore (you know, with fireworks and Jewel, and West Side Story...), but instead we decided to play for no money to no audience and douche-bag staff. Tough call, but we think we made the right decision... There were some sweet fireworks, though. Or maybe I'm mistaking fireworks for burning buildings and gunshots. Not sure. Next day Sunday beach-bumming, to Little Odessa edibles, to Gin and Juice patio party, to Fulton Mall shopping spree/MOMA art farts to happy happy joy joy! Ahh the big city.
And then we take Manhattan...

Adventures! More stories to come....

Oh! Poe!

Baltimore in a nutshell

Baltimore

Pittsburgh Bourgeoisie graves

Chicago

Golden Creams and Frosty Delights!

Morning after a questionable brush with authority in a Pittsburgh cemetery last night (questionable in the sense that we may have imagined it). hmmm. So a Chicago show from which we got paid twice by an expensive sports bar, sped away happily, to find ourselves in Toledo, land of the very few grocery stores, and youngsters making fires with lighter fluid and motor oil, camped in their backyard after a show with the amazing Mr. Gnome. Hooray for LSD and SUV's!! After a premature arrival in Cincinnati, we camp out on the sidewalk of "the worst neighbourhood in America". Debatable, but its nomination for this title is undeniable. After a long discussion with the fire department, Bunk ArtSpace is temporarily moved outside and we get to play on an outdoor backlot platform (earlier home to daydreams)! A disappointingly short set leaves us a little bummed, but the night picks up when a new friend takes us to the warehouse he lives in and shows us around the huge reclaimed (they pay rent though) space used as a workshop space for a future bike co-op, carpentry, general mayhem, and housing a tunnel in its gigantic basement! After a trip to the raddest dumpsters i have ever combed over, we sleep.
The drive to pittsburgh is hot, but not as unbearable as the past few. Kinda sketchy directions take us to Friendship street! Oh yeah- FRIENDSHIP! Hippy tour continues... or not... we play a basement house party to the coolest cats in cooltown, drink numerous PBR's and begin our quest for true Yinzers! That quest is abandoned in the face of deserted steel mills and giant smokestacks. Some of us are more adventurous than others (no names will be named) but it's all AMAZING! Maybe another exclamation point is needed- ! and another !! But did our fearless heroes stop there? No! Off to the graveyard for more late night urban exploration among the giant mausoleums and big breasted sphinxes of middle american big-wigs. Surrounded by fireflies, super stealth ninja cops (invisible, silent ones, no less!) chase us off of the property to continue our discussions of the true origins of crop circles. No stone unturned!
*Ring*Ring* oh that must be the president, calling for his private show... Until the next episode...

Sexy Shower pictures as of June 22 (!)

t.o. streetmeat
  

detroit
 
detroit, trumbellplex